Not long ago, it was believed that men, like studs, only think about sex. Meanwhile, women skillfully dodge marital duties, citing various reasons from menstrual cycles to headaches. Nowadays, the dynamics have shifted. More and more often, men are turning down intimacy. According to statistics, 62% of men refuse sex more frequently than their life partners, with 42% engaging in lovemaking just once every two weeks. These figures were obtained during a sociological survey in Britain. Yet, sexual dissatisfaction can be a leading cause of divorce. So, what’s the issue?
Reason 1: Workaholics, not Sexaholics
A hectic work schedule, stress, and exhaustion are undoubtedly our enemies in any aspect of life. It’s because of them that we lack the energy and time for friends, children, and even sex. And why do you think men are any different? Exhaustion and stress affect them too. And if your man is not just an employee but also a business owner… In that case, work means a lot to him and consumes a great deal of his energy. It’s his brainchild, and he’s responsible for people, even if it’s a small business. So, any work crisis — and thoughts about everything else take a back seat. What sex when the business of his life could go belly up? No amount of bedroom scenes will help him relax, even if you buy beautiful lingerie and dance a striptease. And if work troubles and stressors in his life occur regularly, like the daily crowing of roosters with the sunrise, sooner or later, even the strongest man’s nervous system will collapse under the weight of problems. Then, he’ll need to treat his nervous breakdown in the hospital, not with a “nurse” in his own bed.
Solution: If decreased sexual desire is due to daily workloads and persistent stress, then the best way to improve one’s personal life and restore strength and health is to go on vacation! The recipe for a good vacation is simple — leave all tasks at home, including laptops and other means of communication with the outside world. A mobile phone and camera will suffice for the trip. The main thing is to get your man out of the chaotic nerve-wracking weekdays, and other pleasures will follow naturally. A change of scenery to a more romantic one is excellent for relaxation and encourages sexual experimentation. Show some imagination and be more patient.
Reason 2: Illness Hindering Sex
You may be surprised, but according to sociological research, one of the most common reasons for decreased sexual desire in men in Europe is the use of antidepressants. It turns out that those who experience the burdens of the world, trying to escape stress with medication, end up with sexual problems. They cure one thing and damage another. Additionally, statistics show that most hormonal imbalances and heart conditions inevitably affect a man’s decreased sexual activity.
Solution: Illnesses should be treated, of course. As it’s well known, many men dislike visiting doctors and put it off until the very last moment. A disease may arise not only in the heart but also below the belt. So, if you suspect something is wrong and the man is not eager to complain about his health, schedule an appointment with a doctor yourself. Drag him, drag him, drag him to the appointment!
3rd Reason: Technology Ruins Sex
Laptops, computers, TVs, tablets, phones, gaming consoles, and other wonders of modern technology are true time devourers today. Sit down for 5 minutes to check your email — and an hour flies by. If your man can’t tear himself away from email checks or social media browsing, he’s truly addicted to gadgets and forgets that time needs to be dedicated to other aspects of life too. And after pulling his head away from the screen at night, of course, he just wants to sleep. “Tomorrow, honey,” he whispers wearily. And the cycle repeats.
Solution: Agree that each of you has only one hour in the evening for internet-related activities. And designate some days of the week free from technical excesses. You’ll see how much time such a “network diet” can give you. And how to spend it? Surely, you know best. Refresh your bedding with satin sheets, snuggle up together in a blanket, and treat yourselves to bright sexual fantasies to cure the gray weekdays.
4th Reason: It’s You
Yes, the reason why a man is reluctant to go to bed, stays late at work, and avoids intimacy might be closer than you thought. And his “reluctance” could be due to either excessive sexual activity on the woman’s part or her indifference. Lack of spiritual closeness, trust, and understanding is a reason for men, just as it is for women, to reject intimacy. In this case, before addressing sexual issues, it’s necessary to sort out the relationship. Do you think arguments and heated relationship discussions only fuel passion in sex? Well, your man might see things differently. Constantly “nagging” at your husband — don’t be surprised if he eventually firmly says “no” to you. Also, constant care, oddly enough, can greatly spoil intimate relationships. If you keep asking “did you put on your hat, my little bear cub” all the time, sooner or later you’ll turn into that bear cub’s mom. And if that bear cub is a rational man, he certainly doesn’t need a second mom, especially in his own bed.
Solution: Forget about extremes — don’t save your sexual energy for the weekend, International Women’s Day, or Bastille Day, but forcing your beloved under the covers every night isn’t the best idea either. If daily sex quickly bores a man, he’ll get used to refusals quickly and stop seeing you as an object of desire altogether. So, let’s search for the golden mean, and the most important thing here is not to establish a specific schedule for these “physical workouts” but to create the maximum conditions for intimacy to be passionate and not a routine obligation. Dealing with the nanny syndrome is easier — work on yourself, stop doing all the little chores for your man, thinking that he’ll mess everything up. Let him mess up, let him do things wrong ten times, and on the eleventh, he’ll become a pro in any matter. If by his 30–40s, no one has ever disciplined him, it’s time to let him grow up on his own, instead of cultivating that childish weakness.
5th Reason — Sex Exists, but Not Here
The reason is somewhat similar to its predecessor, only in a more advanced form. In childhood, all boys, after playing to their heart’s content with their favorite toy car (plane, dump truck, scooter…), quickly switched their recent passion to something more intriguing. Boys grow up, habits remain. If a man gets tired of having sex with one woman, he’ll swap her for another. Perhaps you’re not experiencing simple human pleasures for one simple reason — your man has another woman.
Solution: This reason turns out to be the most difficult to eliminate. Beautiful lingerie, a striptease, and other attributes of a cunning seductive wife won’t have any effect here. The problems here are much deeper, so radical solutions are needed. Don’t want to be in second place? Don’t hesitate to decisively bid farewell to relationships that have already lost their spark, where even sex no longer lives. If you still accept these rules of the game, then feel free to find yourself a lover. And not for revenge, but for yourself, for your physical and mental health. Then your self-esteem will remain intact, and good moods are guaranteed!
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